Deirdre Fay — Clearing the “Stuff”, Becoming Safely Embodied, Your Protest is the Key, Attachment Theory, Integrating Sorrow and Aligning Life, and More (#191)

The Nishant Garg Show

“What would ease feel like in my body?”

“TRAUMA HAPPENS IN RELATIONSHIPS…And it is in relationships that we have to heal.”


Deirdre Fay, MSW decades of experience explores the intersection of trauma, attachment, yoga, and meditation, teaching “a radically positive approach to healing trauma.”

She has 35 years of experience as a psychotherapist and educator exploring practical ways of how transformation occurs. Her approach is called a radically positive approach to healing trauma. Her message resonates deeply with those who may look successful on the surface, but internally feel plagued by shame, anxiety, distress, depression – wondering why they’re stuck in repeating relational and life patterns. 

Her third book Becoming Safely Embodied (2021) became a best-seller

Please enjoy!

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Connect with DeirdreWebsite | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter | LinkedIn

Book: Becoming Safely Embodied: A Guide to Organize Your Mind, Body and Heart to Feel Secure in the World

Safely Embodied offerings:

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Show Notes:

  • Where does this name come from? Who gave you this name?
  • Did you ever get a chance to talk to your father about why he gave you this name which means queen of sorrow?
  • You live in France now. So tell us about your connection with Ireland, France and USA? What different places you lived in the us?
  • You want to help people getting unstuck. Could you speak to that please? 
  • You mentioned that your trauma history erupted in the ashram. I would love for us to discuss more about your yoga ashram. Was it in India? So how did you end up going to India in eighties and nineties? What events were leading up to that incident?
  • I’m curious to ask you what happened in the Ashram prior to your trauma history eruption. And how did he recognize that what’s happening to you? Because people may not even know that they are triggered, that trauma is happening. So how do you recognize that something is happening with you? What caused in you at the time?
  • What do you mean by aligning life with God?
  • You have mentioned “stuff” a couple of times. Could you elaborate more on what is “stuff” and what do you mean by that?
  • As an adult, how we can learn these seven fundamental attachment needs. So first thing is I think, knowing the definitions, what are they and what practices we can adopt. Could you walk us through the definitions in brief about all these seven attachment needs, our internal working models, as you say, and as an adult, how can we have those needs met?
  • Do you feel that sometimes we have worked on all these “needs”, we have understood the attachment theories, but at times our old wound itself, the egoic mind comes into play and we start to feel unworthy. That we are not good enough. There are times we feel that we have done the work. Everything is good, but another time, our wounded self or not so good self starts to kick in. And how do we uncover that? So what would you say and what would you suggest to the people who are listening?
  • How do we train our body to feel at ease?
  • Could you suggest blogs, books, resources, anything that we can read or listen or watch to get more of a hang of all these embodiment practices?
  • Let’s talk about your book “becoming safely embodied”, that’s how we got connected. How can someone benefit and learn from this?
  • Advice from older wiser self to current self.
  • Fact vs Feelings
  • Parting thoughts

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