There is no need to rush through the pain. Let it be. Sit with it. Sit with the emptiness in it. There is a pain, isn’t it? Every pain has been the catalyst for growth in my life. The goal isn’t to get away from the pain — feel it completely, and cry if you want to, It will help you grieve and release it from your body.
Everything passes, everything. Nothing stays forever. There is joy and growth on the other side of the pain. I don’t think anyone can find joy in the pain. But, when you sit with it, the pain softens. You get to sit with the pain like it is your friend and when you feel like it, ask your friend — the pain —to leave. Because, your other friend, the growth is waiting for you. Don’t rush in this process. In those moments of pain, you might ask — “why it always happens, why can’t I feel joy.” It’s OK. Life is both suffering and joy. We get to have both.
When you feel pain — reach out to your support system to help you process emotions. You are not your emotions. Emotions may be telling you something about you that you may not have healed yet. Look at it objectively and never identify with it. Just say – “I am experiencing this”.
I experienced so much sadness when the woman I wanted to date didn’t want to go out again. It was tough. I was allowing myself to feel. I was disappointed. I was crying. There came a point when I told myself that I had had enough.
I am complete. I am wholehearted. There is always something to work on. Let’s not rush. As the poet Rumi said — “These pains you feel are messengers, listen to them”.
It’s completely normal to feel pain because you aren’t broken. You are just experiencing pain, you are not the pain. Sometimes, the expectations, the unconscious expectations can lead to pain. I don’t think any human can ever get rid of expectations. It’s recognizing when those expectations show up and then processing accordingly. It’s futile to say — have no attachments. Unhealthy attachments are disasters. Be mindful of your attachments. I always process such issues through free-flow writing.
Every pain acts as a catalyst for growth. All the therapeutic practices won’t take your pain away. Those will help you to feel the pain.
Compassionate inquiry work from Gabor Mate is very helpful in feeling and understanding emotions. We respond to the perception of the events.
The Nishant Garg Show:
This show and blog is about helping Entrepreneurs, Tech Founders, Startup Enthusiasts develop Emotional and Mental health and be more human in their work and personal lives. I interview entrepreneurs, authors, mental health professionals, leadership executive coaches, psychologists, and many more For any questions, please contact me. If you have enjoyed listening to my podcasts, please subscribe to the new podcast updates on Itunes please provide your reviews on Itunes which will really help me.