blog – Page 9 – Nishant Garg

Dr. Gabor Maté — Compassionate Inquiry, Healing the Wounds of Trauma, Authenticity and Attachment, and More

“Trauma isn’t what happens to you, it’s what happens inside you.”
– Gabor Maté

The very first thing I do in the morning right after waking up—I listen to Gabor Mate.

Healing isn’t a linear process.

The word “healing” comes from the Anglo-Saxon word for wholeness and the essential nature of trauma is that it’s a loss of wholeness. It’s the impact of what happened and how that’s manifesting as a disconnect right now in our lives, and how we can reconnect. A proper understanding of trauma actually says, ‘This happened inside me, it’s with me in the present, and because it’s with me in the present, I can do something about it.’ – Gabor Mate

This post highlights some of the resources by Dr. Gabor Maté I listened to and read, which I enjoyed immensely and helped me in gaining a better understanding of myself, my own trauma, coping mechanisms, and much more. I will keep on sharing my other learnings on healing, addiction, trauma, and recovery.

A renowned speaker, and bestselling author, Dr. Gabor Maté is highly sought after for his expertise on a range of topics including addiction, stress and childhood development. Rather than offering quick-fix solutions to these complex issues, Dr. Gabor Maté weaves together scientific research, case histories, and his own insights and experience to present a broad perspective that enlightens and empowers people to promote their own healing and that of those around them.

The bestselling author of four books published in over twenty-five languages, Gabor is an internationally renowned speaker highly sought after for his expertise on addiction, trauma, childhood development, and the relationship of stress and illness. His books include In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters With Addiction; When the Body Says No; The Cost of Hidden Stress; Scattered Minds: The Origins and Healing of Attention Deficit Disorder; and (with Dr. Gordon Neufeld) Hold on to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers.

Please be sure to see the important disclaimer at the bottom of this post. Now, please enjoy!

YouTube talks:

Dr. Gabor Maté – Compassionate Inquiry : Dr. Gabor Maté, renowned addiction expert and international speaker, discusses Compassionate Inquiry, a psycho-therapeutic method for facilitating physical, mental and emotional healing. Born out of necessity and rooted in the inseparability of mind and body, Dr. Maté highlights the importance of processing unresolved pain within ourselves as the foundation of helping others free themselves from the past, release trauma, and connect to a healing power within.
Dr. Gabor Maté: Consequences of Stressed Parenting: Dr. Gabor Maté talks about the link between stressed parenting and the preponderance of childhood disorders like ADHD, autism and oppositional defiant disorder, at the KMT Child Development & Community Conference.
Dr. Gabor Maté: How stress can cause disease: Dr. Gabor Maté talks about how hidden stress from childhood and beyond can impact overall health and even evoke diseases like cancer and multiple sclerosis.
Dr Gabor Maté Attachment and Brain Development
Authenticity: At this workshop on November 15, 2012, Dr. Gabor Maté presented an in-depth analysis of vicarious trauma – including definitions, myths, and realities of trauma and vicarious trauma, as well as the sources and triggers for stress, its physiology, and how to release it. Dr. Maté integrated meditation, music, and excerpts from two of his books, into lively and interactive sessions, with all participants engaged in learning from each other and Dr. Maté.
Dr. Gabor Maté ~ Who We Are When We Are Not Addicted: The Possible Human : Dr. Gabor Maté gives us clues as to who we are when we are not addicted. Filmed January 9th, 2012 in Vancouver, B.C. as part of a launch for Beyond Addiction: The Yogic Path to Recovery. For more information about the Beyond Addiction program created by Sat Dharam Kaur N.D. and featuring Dr. Gabor Maté. Dr. Maté also teaches an online course on his approach to therapy called Compassionate Inquiry
Gabor Mate: Implicit Memory :Key points to consider: What happened to you? What’s the emotional feeling? What’s your interpretation? This talk helped me in recognizing my emotional feeling of helplessness from childhood.

Blog I read: Healing The Wounds Of Trauma (Therapy Today, September, 2020)

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: Please note that Information shared in this post is for educational purposes only, and is not intended in any way as psychological treatment, advice or consultation of any kind. “if you are struggling with trauma and other mental health issues, please seek the treatment of a licensed mental health professional.

The Nishant Garg Show:

This show is about extracting information on Mindfulness, Personal Development, Spirituality. I am on a mission to spread Mindfulness and I’d love for you to join me in this movement. For any question, please contact me. If you have enjoyed listening to my podcasts, please subscribe to the new podcast updates on Itunes please provide your reviews on Itunes which will really help me. S

This podcast is brought to you by Friday Newsletter. If you’d like to learn more about what I am reading, new documentaries, what I am learning new, recent podcast updates, things I am experimenting with, or anything —which I share extensively in my weekly short and sweet “Friday Newsletter”. No spam ever! I hate that too!

The Creative Process, Be fascinated, Work hard, and Taking Things to the Next Level

“Instead of being crushed by the gap, I became fascinated. I wanted to know more.“
– Scott Shute

While preparing for the interview preparation of Scott Shute, I found this LinkedIn article that he had written a few years. I felt a strong desire to share it with others with the permission of Scott himself and he was kind enough to give me a green light. Scott shares his creative process in Photography. What he shares is can be applied in any creative process. I feel inclined to what he says because I have used similar principles unknowingly in my podcasting. Just know that you will suck badly at anything new. As my favorite Tony Robbins says – “Have a strong desire, Take massive action, Keep changing your strategy.”

Scott Shute sits at the intersection of ancient wisdom traditions and the business world. He currently leads Mindfulness and Compassion programs at LinkedIn. After twenty five years of customer-oriented leadership roles, he found his dream job, where he gets to utilize his entire skill set and embrace his passions. In this work he explores the possibility of human potential, helping employees become the very best version of themselves.

Scott’s new book “Full Body Yes” is coming out on May 11th, 2021. Check the details here

Quick summary:

Instead of being crushed by the gap, I became fascinated. I wanted to know more.
Instead of just taking my camera on trips, I started taking trips to use my camera.
In the creative process, there is both an inflow and outflow required to get to the Next Level.
There’s something special about a quest to a perfect that’s completely unattainable. So here’s my goal – one that pushes me to keep expanding my creations.
There’s always a Next Level.

Now, let’s get into the details and here is Scott:

It’s our nature to create. We do it every day. Sometimes we’re even excited about it. If you ask people what they’re passionate about, you’ll get incredible variety. Their new assignment at work that will increase revenue. Their new relationship. Competing to make the Lacrosse team. Learning to fly a drone. Each of these stretch us beyond yesterday’s normal, pulling us forward in a never ending learning curve. Life finds a way to continually shape us into better versions of ourselves, even when we’re not trying.

To be really great at something requires two basic things.

Be fascinated
Work hard

That’s pretty much the story of every single successful person in history. This is the story of my latest creative obsession and my quest to be amazing at it.

I’ve always loved photography, but something changed over the past couple of years. With my son going to college I found that I had a little more free time and I needed a creative outlet. It was time to take it to the Next Level. I bought a new camera (Sony A7II) and committed to shooting in RAW format – that’s the uncompressed version that the professionals use. The upside is that the files can be edited much more than “normal” JPEG, extracting every drop of color and precision. The downside is that straight out of the camera they don’t look as good, so you’re committing to editing nearly every single photo. The next step was learning in depth how to edit – the post processing magic that turns ordinary into special. I’d played around with simple tools like Google’s free Picasa, but to go Next Level, I needed to learn Lightroom and Photoshop.

Using a combination of LinkedIn Learning and other content I found on the web, and *lots* of practice, I started to hone my craft. Photos that were ok turned into good. Photos that were good turned into great (at least I thought so). I had a couple that I was really proud of. The best I’d ever taken.

I started sharing and posting on photo sites like 500px. I quickly realized that my “amazing” shot of the Golden Gate Bridge was fairly pedestrian compared to what was already out there. I was falling in love with the creative process and wanted to push to see what was possible. My work wasn’t as good as the other photographers I was following, but I was starting to figure out how they were doing it. Instead of being crushed by the gap, I became fascinated. I wanted to know more.

I started seeking out photo opportunities. Instead of just taking my camera on trips, I started taking trips to use my camera. It’s not about being at the right place, now it’s about being at the right place at the right time with the right idea. I starting planning shots days or weeks in advance, driving an hour or two to sit in one spot at sunset, taking 200 shots in hopes of getting just one I would be proud of. Each time I’d come back with a haul, excited to start the editing process. I’ve come to find editing photos to be strangely therapeutic. Instead of watching TV, I’ll pull up shots I took two years ago and see if there’s anything new I can make happen. This is where the art comes alive. This is where the “flow” happens.

For photography (like most things), the quest for new and better is endless – there’s always a new exotic place to visit, or changing skies that make the bridge light up in a way I’ve never seen before, or a flower in my neighborhood while I walk the dog that opens up in just a certain way after it rains. I look at light and detail in a different way than ever before.

I also play music – acoustic guitar and sing. I’ve realized over the years that I can practice in my home office for months, but if I never play in front of other people, eventually my interest and energy wanes. If I play a small gig, or a backyard concert for friends, then I get fired up again. It makes me want to go learn new material or sharpen up the old stuff, refining my technique. It makes me want to keep moving down that never ending path to “better”. I get fascinated again. Simple as it sounds, this was a huge realization – In the creative process, there is both an inflow and outflow required to get to the Next Level.

With these hard-earned realizations, I’ve tried to structure my photography obsession in a different way, to ensure the fuse stays lit. I’ll find time during business travel to dedicate to photography. (Yep, I’m keeping my day job, along with its endless opportunities for creation). And while it’s been fun to share my latest captures with friends at work, or share with everyone on Instagram (@scottshutephotos), it wasn’t quite enough motivation to keep me driving forward. There’s something special about a quest to a perfect that’s completely unattainable. So here’s my goal – one that pushes me to keep expanding my creations. I want to keep improving my art to the point where others want to buy it – where it moves them so much that they just have to have it hanging on their wall. For a landscape photographer that’s pretty much as good as it gets.

There’s always a Next Level.

The Nishant Garg Show:

Tim Ferriss — How To Build A World-Class Network and Large Audience

“Don’t dismiss people, don’t be a dick, and don’t rush. Play the long game.“
Tim Ferriss

This post highlights some of the podcasts by Tim Ferriss I’ve listened to several times which I enjoyed immensely and helped me a lot in my podcasting, how to connect with people, how to network with people, how to build deep relationships, and much more. If these resources help you in some ways, I’d love to hear about your experiences. Some episodes go deeper into depression, books, and other resources.

Tim Ferriss has been listed as one of Fast Company’s “Most Innovative Business People” and one of Fortune’s “40 under 40.” He is an early-stage technology investor/advisor (Uber, Facebook, Shopify, Duolingo, Alibaba, and 50+ others) and the author of five #1 New York Times and Wall Street Journal bestsellers, including The 4-Hour Workweek and Tools of Titans: The Tactics, Routines, and Habits of Billionaires, Icons, and World-Class Performers. The Observer and other media have called Tim “the Oprah of audio” due to the influence of The Tim Ferriss Show podcast, which is the first business/interview podcast to exceed 100 million downloads. It has now exceeded 600 million downloads.

Please be sure to see the important disclaimer at the bottom of this post. Now, please enjoy!

Podcasts I listened to:

How to Build a World-Class Network in Record Time: In this episode, you’ll learn:
- The most common mistakes people make when attempting to “network”,
- how to interact with A-listers (or opt not to),
- how to enjoy the ride and not end up exhausted with a pocket full of business cards that do nothing, and much more.
How to Build a Large Audience From Scratch: 50% of this episode is spent explaining how Tim built an audience from scratch, if he had to start over today. Some other questions, Tim answers,
- If you’re the average of the 5 people you surround yourself with, who are those 5 people for you?
- Based on the self-experiments you conducted in your books, are there any habits you continue to implement on a daily basis?
Daymond John and How to Turn Weaknesses into Strengths: In this episode, you’ll learn untold stories about Tim’s beginnings and rough starts. If you’ve ever felt like a beginner in business, or found your back against a wall, you will learn how to take your lack of resources and turn it into a strength.
Guy Raz Interviews Tim Ferriss — How I Built This — Key Lessons, Critical Decisions, and Reinvention for Fun and Profit: In this episode, Guy traces Tim’s story from the very early days to the current day, asking him about key decisions, hard times, obstacles, lessons learned, and much, much more.
Cal Fussman Corners Tim Ferriss: All the pieces are coming together here!” — Cal Fussman
Guy Kawasaki interviews Tim Ferriss: This episode isn’t completely feel good, pixie dust, and unicorns. Guy and Tim delve into heavy topics such as depression and suicide. Tim also explains the role of physical exercise in his wellbeing, why he doesn’t use social media anymore, and how to grow a podcast.

The Nishant Garg Show:

Attachment Styles, Communication in Relationships, Fear of Commitment and Healthy Boundaries — Lisa Scott

“Trauma isn’t what happens to you, it’s what happens inside you.”
– Gabor Maté

This post highlights some of the resources by Lisa Scott listened to, recently which I enjoyed so much. In fact, I have been listening to this podcast on repeat. So, here is backstory. In the second week of April 2021, I was feeling deep emotional pain and heartache. I’ve been in the process of understanding and uncovering my own childhood issues and trauma. I had heard Gabor Mate and other Legendaries mention about parent-child attachments during early years and how it shapes our relationships with ourselves and with others when we grow older.

I searched “attachment” on Spotify and this new podcast from Lisa popped up. As I started listening—I was completely thrilled and it resonated with me so much that I could go back (in my mind) to my childhood and see some deep things with less resistance and better clarity.

Hence, I decided to list down all the podcast episodes I listened to in a week so that you can also learn about attachment styles and their close siblings.

Lisa Scott is a licensed professional counselor and host of her own podcast, What’s Next With Lisa Scott. Lisa is well known for her solution based and client focused style of therapy. Aside from hosting her own podcast, Lisa owns a private practice, and is a professor of psychology. With over fifteen years of experience as a mental health professional and experience ranging from crisis intervention in a clinical setting to working with families and individuals, Lisa’s passion and focus remains on empowering people to establish healthy loving relationships not only with themselves but with others in their life .

Lisa’s podcast is for all ages and all walks all life. If you’re human this podcast is for you. Lisa Scott is a licensed professional counselor who has developed techniques to start living a more authentic, fulfilled life, by taking common theories from the therapy world and making them relatable and something people can connect to. Anger, sadness, anxiety, self worth, authenticity and how to take your power back are just of the the concepts she discusses.

Connect with Lisa: Twitter | Instagram | Email | Support the show(Paypal)

Please be sure to see the important disclaimer at the bottom of this post. Now, please enjoy!

Podcasts I listened to:

Anxious Attachment in Relationships: In this episode, Lisa talks about what it looks like to anxiously attach to people in relationships, and how that can hinder your relationship success. Listen to this episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or anywhere you get your podcasts.
Fearful Avoidant Attachment Style in Relationships: In this episode Lisa discusses, fearful avoidant relationship style. This attachment style can prove to be one of the most difficult, because these people withdrawal often times with no warning when things get too intimate. Listen in as Lisa explains how to spot it in someone you’re dating, how to spot it in yourself, and how to work through it to form a secure attachment.
Dismissive Avoidant Attachment Style in Relationships: In this episode, Lisa discusses third attachment style, dismissive avoidant style. This attachment style can be a result of a caregiver who minimized their child’s feelings, and therefore never taught the child how to feel or to be comfortable with anyone else’s feelings. Listen in, as Lisa tells you what it is, how to spot it, and what to do about it.
Secure Attachment in Relationships: In this episode, Lisa details what secure attachment is, what it feels like, how to find it, and how to take care of it. If you’re craving a healthy relationship, listen in learn how to connect to yourself and those around you in a way that feels empowered and healthy.
Communication in Relationships: Why does communicating in your relationship always seem so hard??? Listen in, as Lisa goes through what healthy communication in a relationship looks like as well as gives some pointers and advice regarding how to start communicating more effectively in your relationship, today! Lisa also answers a listeners question about how to get over a break up.
Healthy Boundaries and Toxic Positivity: In this episode, Lisa helps you work through how to set healthy boundaries that feel good and don’t alienate everyone around you. Lisa also addresses how being too positive all of the time can actually become a toxic coping mechanism.
Do You Have A Fear of Commitment?: In this episode, Lisa explains what a fear of commitment actually means and she explains how to get to the root of pushing through that discomfort. Lisa also details what kind of things you need to do to help ensure you can enter a relationship with a secure attachment vs an anxious or insecure one.

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: Please note that Information shared in this post is for educational purposes only, and is not intended in any way as psychological treatment, advice or consultation of any kind. “if you are struggling with relationship issues,trauma and other mental health issues, please seek the treatment of a licensed mental health professional.

The Nishant Garg Show:

Trauma and Addiction: Resources, Podcasts, Blogs, Books, and More — Gabor Maté

“Trauma isn’t what happens to you, it’s what happens inside you.”
Gabor Maté

This post is brought to you by my upcoming LOVE FESTIVAL – RETREAT. It’s a weekend-long retreat with the intention of opening our hearts. Please check LOVE FESTIVAL – RETREAT to learn more.

This post highlights some of the resources by Dr. Gabor Maté I read, listened to, recently which I enjoyed immensely and helped me in gaining a better understanding of myself, my own trauma, coping mechanisms, and much more. I will keep on sharing my other learnings on healing, addiction, trauma, and recovery. If these resources help you in some ways, I’d love to hear about your experiences. Please feel free to email me or comment on this post.

Please be sure to see the important disclaimer at the bottom of this post. Now, please enjoy!

YouTube talks:

When The Body Says No In Psychotherapy: Highlights: Biases of western medicine, Childhood trauma and seeing an “ologist”, The fatal beliefs you need to drop NOW, The unconscious journey from state to trait, Illness can be a powerful teacher.
How emotions affects our cognitive functioning: watch this to understand first : “what has happened to us” and then we can understand “what has happened to our children”. With this understanding, we can then be more aware of our own behaviors and challenges in our lives and thereafter we can decide if there is a need to seek intervention with the issue we have on hand.
The Biology of Loss and Recovery: In this presentation, Dr. Gabor Maté discusses the impact of early childhood stress on the individual and societal levels, he also explores how to foster resilience.
Conversation About Addiction with Gabor Maté and Arold Langeveld: Dr. Mate provides his expertise and vast working knowledge of the brain and child development and other issues related to addiction.
Perinatal Services BC – Biology of Loss: Recognizing Impaired Attachments & Fostering Resilience: Dr. Gabor Maté illuminates the sources of developmental challenges, childhood and adult mental disorders, and physical health issues as originating in the prenatal, perinatal, and early childhood periods. This presentation focuses on how we can prevent maldevelopment through attuned parenting and restore and foster resilience in children already facing developmental challenges.
Spiritual seeking, Addiction and the Search for Truth: Gabor Maté shares his perspective on spiritual seeking, addiction and the search for truth.
Keynote ACES to Assets 2019 – Dr. Gabor Maté – Trauma as disconnection from the self: Gabor explores the theme of trauma as disconnection from the self and why relationships are central to the prevention and recovery of trauma.

Blogs I read:

How to Build a Better Culture of Good Health: [Important notes]: link of diseases with emotional life patterns, self-imposed stress is a major risk factor for disease of all kinds, compulsive self-disregard and emotional repression, early childhood coping dynamics may result in adult illness and dysfunction.
BEYOND DRUGS: The Universal Experience of Addiction: Addiction is manifested in any behavior that a person craves, finds temporary relief or pleasure in but suffers negative consequences as a result of, and yet has difficulty giving up.

Podcasts I listened to:

Dr. Gabor Maté — New Paradigms, Ayahuasca, and Redefining Addiction (#298): “Trauma isn’t what happens to you, it’s what happens inside you.” I have already listened to this episode a few times and every time I uncover my own childhood trauma and try to attempt to understand the cause. I highly recommend to listen to this podcast with Tim Ferriss.
When the Body Says No: The Costs of Hidden Stres‪s‬: Learn how to prevent and heal illnesses related to hidden stress. Can a person literally die of loneliness? Is there a connection between the ability to express emotions and Alzheimer’s disease? Is there such a thing as a “cancer personality”? Stress and emotions play in an array of common diseases, including arthritis, cancer, diabetes, heart disease and multiple sclerosis.

The Nishant Garg Show:

My Lessons learned on Love, Relationships, Sex, Eroticism From Esther Perel

The quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives.
Esther Perel

I am very fascinated by learning new things about love, relationships, sex, and how the quality of our life shapes when we cultivate deep and rich relationships with ourselves and others. I am deeply in love with the work of Esther Perel.

These are some of the resources by Esther Perel I read, listened to, recently which I enjoyed immensely and helped me in gaining a better understanding of myself and connecting with others. I will keep on sharing my other learnings on relationships. Now, please enjoy. If these resources help you in some ways, I’d love to hear about your experiences. Please feel free to email me or comment on this post.

[Disclaimer: I don’t have a personal contact with Esther yet, nor has she been on my podcast yet. I am always inspired to share my learnings with others and this is my way of sharing and giving back]

Esther Perel is a Psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author. Recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on modern relationships. Fluent in nine languages, she helms a therapy practice in New York City and serves as an organizational consultant for Fortune 500 companies around the world. Her celebrated TED talks have garnered more than 20 million views and her international bestseller Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence became a global phenomenon translated into 25 languages. Her newest book is the New York Times bestseller The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity (HarperCollins). Esther is also an executive producer and host of the popular podcast Where Should We Begin

Blogs I read:

Rituals For Healthy Relationships At Every Stage: Routines are concrete repetitive actions that help us develop skills while creating continuity and order. They ground us and create familiarity. Rituals, on the other hand, are routines that are elevated by creativity, driven by intention, and imbued with meaning.
How Erotic Thinking Helps Emotional Connection: Freedom and security are twin faces of the same coin. Eroticism isn’t inherently sexual; it’s an experience of aliveness which beats back deadness. Creativity is where Eroticism lives. Trying something new—especially something creative—is a great way to jumpstart emotional connection.
Coping With Loneliness Around The Holidays: Feeling lonely around the holidays can make us feel as if something is wrong with us. Everybody else seems to know how to be happy, how to be together, how to be festive, merry, and bright. But feeling lonely around the winter holidays is extremely common. And even more so during this year of isolation.

Podcasts I listened to:

Esther Perel: Building Resilient Relationships: How do we build more trusting and empathetic relationships, even during a crisis? This hour, therapist Esther Perel shares ideas on creating lasting bonds in romance, family, and at work.
Esther Perel and Debbie Millman Interview : Esther Perel explores the fascinating design of marriage, modern intimacy and relationships—and the complex dynamics of infidelity. Debbie talks to therapist and author Esther Perel about marriage, polyamory, and adultery.
Tim Ferriss interview with Esther Perel: The Relationship Episode: Sex, Love, Polyamory, Marriage, and More (with Esther Perel) (#241)
Tim Ferriss interview with Esther Perel: Intimacy, Emotional Baggage, Relationship Longevity, and More – Esther Perel (#271)

Audio book I enjoy on my walk: Esther Perel’s Where Should We Begin?: The Arc of Love: Esther Perel invites you to listen to private and intimate conversations exploring the evolution of relationships. Hear six sets of people at different points in their quest for romantic and familial love, and much more

Transcript I read: Esther Perel: Building Resilient Relationships

You can also supplement this post with my 2 podcast interviews on love and relationships:

I hope you enjoyed reading and learning from this blog as much as I enjoyed it!

The Nishant Garg Show:

This show is about extracting information on Mindfulness, Personal Development, and Spirituality. I am on a mission to spread Mindfulness and I’d love for you to join me in this movement. For any questions, please contact me. If you have enjoyed listening to my podcasts, please subscribe to the new podcast updates on Itunes please provide your reviews on Itunes which will really help me. S

Susanne Grant — Short Advice From The Best In The World

I crafted a list of 10 life’s philosophical questions that I wanted to answers for myself. I could easily answer the questions based on my thinking. I thought—what would it look like if I ask the same set of questions to the best in the world from the different domain—so that I can learn from them—what they do, how they think on the same questions, and much more! I started this with a little experiment and soon—I got 50+ people to say yes to send their responses. Now, I take the pleasure of sharing the expert’s information with you so that we all can learn and grow from each other.

If you’d like to learn more about what I am reading, new documentaries, what I am learning new, recent podcast updates, things I am experimenting with, or anything —which I share extensively in my weekly short and sweet “Friday Newsletter”. No spam ever! I hate that too!

Susanne Grant is an Award-winning Work-Life Balance Integration Expert and Intuitive Business Coach & Consultant and International Bestselling Author of the book Leaders: Women Who Change The World Through Their Business. She supports Busy Business Owners and CEOs to scale their business by becoming an authority in their field without putting in more hours.

After being diagnosed with Complex PTSD at 17 and a burnout at 25, Susanne knew it was time for a drastic change. Even though she was told she was beyond help, she found a way to recover from the “unrecoverable” in the years to come. Understanding the importance of (mental) health and the impact it has on your daily life, performance and intimate relationships has given her great insights which she is now honored to give back to her clients.

For more info, Connect with Susanne: Website | LinkedIn

Nishant: You have interacted with many successful people over the years – what have you
found are the most beneficial exercises that people really feel have changed their
lives for the better?

Susanne: I have the honour of interacting with a lot of successful people over the years who felt absolutely rubbish on the inside. Even though they looked successful on the outside, they felt like a failure on the inside. What this taught me is that success is a mindset, success is a choice. Often installed in us during the early years of childhood, it becomes our blueprint for future success. Unraveling this and what you personally believe what success means to you, is the key to living a life that is fulfilling and satisfying – and not just looking like a success on the outside. Others don’t get to decide what success means to you. Hence me saying success is a choice, you can feel like the most successful person in the world and not have anything to show for and vice versa. The most important exercise I’ve learned therefore is gratitude. Be grateful for what you have and who you are, because let’s face it, there is only one of you! And that is worth celebrating any day!

Nishant: How do you cultivate joy in your life? Whom do you consider the most happy and
fulfilled to you personally, and why? Could you share any instance(s) that caused
you unhappiness and how you dealt with it?

Susanne: My baby boy when he is eating food is the happiest and fulfilled person I know. He is two years old and he loves food. The way he touches it, eats it and enjoys it, is something I never got to experience due to severe food allergies when I was a child – and even now still. Seeing him, it is changing my perception of food completely. Because, if that is the way food can make me feel that good and not cause pain, inflammation, allergic reactions or generally unhappy, I definitely want to be eating more!

In the past I’ve dealt with this by avoiding certain types of food when my body responded that way, however, thanks to my baby boy I noticed my relationship with food is changing completely. Rather than it feeling like a necessary evil it is shifting towards the most wonderful and nutritional experience you can give yourself!

Nishant: How do you find the balance between being appreciative of what you already
have and striving to achieve more?

Susanne: I believe this ties in with mindset as I mentioned above. It is ok to want more, even if you are perfectly happy with what you have now. It is part of life to explore, develop and change! Although growing up, I was taught it was greedy to want more, it is not true. Life is about creating, growing and expanding, so the balance I find is a state of being where I am grateful for what I have and happy to be moving towards new and exciting things too.

Nishant: What advice people should ignore when suffering with depression, anxiety, or
any other negative emotions? Do you have a particular message you would like
to give to the people?

Susanne: The thing people should ignore is when others say there is nothing you can do about it, you are just going to have to live with it. I was diagnosed with complex PTSD at 17 and was told I was beyond help and I managed to resolve it completely. For me, it was tied in with the food allergies as my gut health was completely to pieces. We know now that gut health is very important in regards to general health and mental health. So if you are not seeing the results you want, it might be worth exploring your gut health. There are 8 billion people on this planet, statistically speaking there will be a few people out there able to help you! I can guarantee you that! Just because you haven’t found a solution yet, it doesn’t mean you are never going to be able to improve or completely resolve it in the future.

Please enjoy!

The Nishant Garg Show is listened to in 24 countries and is about extracting information on Mindfulness, Personal Development, Spirituality. I am on a mission to spread Mindfulness and I’d love for you to join me in this movement. For any question, please contact me. If you have enjoyed listening to my podcasts, please subscribe to the new podcast updates on Itunes. Please provide your reviews on Itunes which will really help me. Subscribe to the Newsletter. You won’t be spammed! I hate spams too! You will receive only one email every Friday on the latest published podcasts.

My Short Journey: Letter To A Friend on Pain, Rejections, Experiments, Books, Meditation, and Much More

My Short Journey: Letter To A Friend on Pain, Rejections, Experiments, Books, Meditation and Much More. A friend asked me what books I have read or re-read in the last few years that might have made the most impact on my life. I thought it’s a good opportunity to reflect back in life and take notes of the books I’ve re-read so far, how I started meditation, and other resources.. Before I get into the resources—I’d like to share my short journey starting 2017 which I have never written about.

A friend asked me what books I have read or re-read in the last few years that might have made the most impact on my life. I thought it’s a good opportunity to reflect back on life and take notes of the books I’ve re-read so far, how I started meditation, and other resources.. Before I get into the resources—I’d like to share my short journey starting pin 2017 which I have never written about.

Now, let’s the story begin!

Year 2017

In February of 2017, I found myself saying why it always happens to me. The woman I was dating for a few months had broken up with up me. I was emotionally devastated. I had hit the rock bottom emotionally. It always seemed to be the same story—the girls I wanted to date parted their ways after sometime. I told myself—I have had enough and now no more.

I started searching on YouTube something along the lines of “how to find love or how to attract a woman”. I don’t remember the exact keywords—you get my point. I stumbled upon Coach Corey Wayne and his teachings changed the direction of my life. I have never been the same since then. I started listening to his audio book and recognized all the old patterns and beliefs, which were not serving me. I listened to his book 18 times in just 3.5 months. I started to gain confidence with women. I must say that building confidence in any skill takes time. Gaining confidence with women didn’t happen overnight. I started going on bunch of dates, kept failing, kept rising, and changing my approach.

I used to practice approaching 10 different women every day to start the conversation just enough to keep going. Repetition is the mother of skill. Initially, It was super scary and I was a nervous wreck. I didn’t stop and kept going. Any skills development takes times through hardships, failures and rejections. I wrote about my dating experience extensively in this blog post Dating and Relationships: Rejections, Confidence, Alpha Male, and Self-Reliance. You can read his book for free by subscribing to his newsletters. To this date, I have listened to this book 57 times and almost every day—I watch his YouTube videos while eating dinner. Again, repetition is the mother of skill. Confidence in one area gives strength and courage to build confidence in other areas. As a super introvert myself—my confidence with women started to show in different areas.

In the September of 2017, I applied for a job and negotiated for 30% salary increase.

I was about to turn 30 in July 2017. This was the only book I had ever read in the Personal development and Self-help world. As the saying goes—“What you don’t know, you don’t know”. Coach Corey Wayne always mentioned the work of Tony Robbins and Wayne Dyer in his YouTube newsletters. As I was learning to unlearn my old patterns and seeing changes in myself, I decided to buy Tony Robbins book Money: Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom that gave me new insights about investing money in S&P500, index funds, and much more.

Somewhere around October timeframe, I bought Jim Rohn’s books

Seasons of Life
My Philosophy for Successful Living
Twelve Pillars

I wanted to learn the sales process and applied for a part time, and to my surprise—I got a part time job in a trampoline store for 3 months that paid me $15 per hour. My goal was to learn the sales and not to make money as my full time job as a software engineer was more than enough to pay my bills and live a good life.

Also, I started Japa meditation Getting In The Gap Meditation with Dr. Wayne Dyer and making bed became part of morning routines.

Year 2018

I was getting better from the inside. I wanted to create passive income and tried my hands in network marketing. After a few months, I realized this is not my cup of tea and decided to part ways. Somewhere around the July timeframe, I came across the work of Brendon Burchard. His work appealed to me so much that I signed up for his 5 day High Performance event in Phoenix in September. His Release meditation helped me in being consistent and since then meditation for 20-30 mins is part of my daily routine.

In November of 2018, I signed up a workshop in LA, which is called Masters In Transformational Training. I signed up for their 5 days BASIC workshop which led to another 5 days Advanced workshop, and then 4 months of Legacy program. I spent 6 months in all those workshops and visiting LA almost every month became my normal for 6 months. In that period, I made new friends and still great friends with them. Those workshops gave me new awareness, insights, understanding about others and myself. There were so many breakthroughs. One of the important one was to letting go of the self-judgment that I have an accent and can’t succeed in a foreign land. Once I did let of that judgement, things turned around. What a beautiful and yet challenging 6 months.

I was doing bunch of experiments. I started running free mastermind virtual classes on productivity and to my surprise—only one friend showed up in all the classes. I didn’t give up. I kept going.

Year 2019

In the March of 2019, I decided to buy a 2500 sq. ft. house for myself and the move happened in May with so much excitement and joy—until I found myself unhappy about living in such a big house. I didn’t want to deal with so many responsibilities and decided to sell it off. It took me 6 months to decide to sell the house. I needed more peace of mind than the financial benefits and chose the former.

I was also teaching free classes about productivity and energy management in coffee shops. There were times only one person would show up and many other times—no one.

Year 2020

I wasn’t feeling excited about my software job. It was on Jan 6 morning—I was feeling very depressed before going to the work after the winter break. I wrote down my feelings in a journal and the total pages filled were seven. I realized—what if I find a way to record these pages and help someone going through the same trajectory. That moment gave birth to the podcast “The Nishant Garg Show”.

In July of 2020, I had sold the house, moved to new part of town, and downsized to 650 sq. ft. apartment.

Let’s look at the resources now:

Books: Below is the list of books I started reading since 2017. Some I have read it a few times, and others I’ve read it dozens of times. Please note that there are some books I still revisit from time to time when the need and situation arises.

Psycho-Cybernetics: Updated and Expanded by Maxwell Maltz. This is a great book on developing inner-confidence and self-image.
How to Be a 3% Man, Winning the Heart of the Woman of Your Dreams by Corey Wayne. A wonderful book on dating, relationships, confidence and self-reliance.
The Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale. Name itself says a lot!
How To Stop Worrying And Start Living by Dale Carnegie
As A Man Thinketh by James Allen
Man’s Search for Meaning by Victor Frankl. I revisit this book again and again whenever self-doubt creeps in, or whenever I need some alignment on life’s purpose. This is the most recommended book on my podcast “The Nishant Garg Show”.
The Magic of Thinking Big by David Schwartz. Highly recommended by Tim Ferriss. One specific chapter “How to Think and Dream Creatively” I have read it dozens of times, and every time I read it, I innovate something new in life.
Seasons of Life by Jim Rohn
My Philosophy for Successful Living by Jim Rohn
Twelve Pillars by Jim Rohn
Wisdom of the Ages: 60 Days to Enlightenment by Wayne Dyer.
The Power of Intention: Learning to Co-Create Your World Your Way by Wayne Dyer
Tribe of Mentors: Short Life Advice from the Best in the World by Tim Ferriss
Money: Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom by Tony Robbins
Awareness: The Perils and Opportunities of Reality by Anthony de Mello. I picked up this book in the late 2019 and have read it 50+ times. I highly recommend this book.
High Performance Habits: How Extraordinary People Become That Way by Brendon Burchard
The Effective Executive: The Definitive Guide to Getting the Right Things Done by Peter F. Drucker
The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business by Charles Duhigg
Switch: How to Change Things When Change Is Hard by Dan and Chip Heath
The Power of Moments: Why Certain Experiences Have Extraordinary Impact by Dan and Chip Heath
The ONE Thing: The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results by Gary Keller
The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem by Nathaniel Branden
The Power of Vulnerability: Teachings of Authenticity, Connection, and Courage by Brené Brown PhD
Think and Grow Rich: The Original: An Official Publication of The Napoleon Hill Foundation by Napolean Hill
The Power of Full Engagement: Managing Energy, Not Time, Is the Key to Performance and Personal Renewal by Jim Loehr. A great book on how to manage your energy.
Gratitude Works!: A 21-Day Program for Creating Emotional Prosperity by Robert A. Emmons
Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck. A great resource on cultivating growth mindset in all the walks of life.
The Art of Possibility: Transforming Professional and Personal Life by Rosamund Stone Zander. I love this book and read it dozens of times. You will learn to create possibilities in the times of rejections, failures, and much more.
The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman. I think I have read this book 20+ times and what a gem! You will learn how to show affection to your partner the way they can receive. It will also help you to understand how you like to be loved.
The Art of Happiness by His Holiness the Dalai Lama. The purpose of life is to be happy.
The Power of Positive Living by Norman Vincent Peale
Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman Ph.D
Training Camp: What the Best Do Better Than Everyone Else by Jon Gordon
First Things First by Stephen Covey
Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married by Gary Chapman

Meditation: I believe in simplicity and keep my meditation simple and sweet. Most of the time, I just close my eyes and practice silent meditation.

Release Meditation Technique – Instruction by Founder Brendon Burchard
Getting In The Gap Meditation with Dr. Wayne Dyer
All the meditations by Dr. Joe Dispenza
Recently in 2021, I started to meditate on binaural beats. You can find the bunch of audios on YouTube.

Motivation audios. Tony Robbins, Jim Rohn, and Les Brown are my favorite go-to people on YouTube whenever I need some motivation and I always feel motivated after listening to them.

Please enjoy!